He said - I just want some time with my friends.
She said - He must not love me, why can’t he ask me to go along?
He said - Wow the day flew by.
She said - Wow, he didn’t miss me at all!
He said - I love you.
She said - I wonder if he loves me as much as I love him.
He said - I’m just wanting to be casual.
She said - I can change that.
He said - I’m gonna be home late after hanging with the guys but if you want to meet up around 2am thats cool.
She said - Awesome! He IS thinking about me, misses me and I AM important to him!
He said - I need some space.
She said - How long before I should call him?
He said - I want to see other people.
She said - What’s wrong with me?
He said - I just have to get my career on track before I can commit.
She said - As soon as he feels secure he is going to marry me.
There, thats enough examples.
Okay so it is something we do. We are told one thing and twist it into another.
Either toward an overly optimistic point of view or a totally negative one.
We need to learn to LISTEN and take things for what they are instead of trying to make them what we want to hear or what we fear hearing.
Lets examine the examples:
Ask if the real issue is them needing time for themselves to explore their thoughts and feelings or if the break is needed because of something you have done, a behavior of yours or if perhaps they are not feeling the love anymore.
- The contact date is upheld and you discuss things from there.
- He avoids, ignores and refuses contact. ITS OVER!
We have to have a healthy mix of self confidence and reality. Selling ourselves on a dream of false hope is just as bad as always looking at every little thing in a negative light.